I was sitting in my office setting up a helmet and Ouija board to talk with a loyal Cosimanian minion in Taiwan because it is a means of communication that cannot be tapped and I turned to see a demon standing next to me. I looked and asked, “What can I do for you?”

“I want your soul!” came the rumbling response.

I laughed and said, “Well, I’m Uncle Chuckie and you can’t have it.”

At this point the demon looked really embarrassed and said, “I’m sorry sir. I didn’t know. I mean I was out looking for souls and there you were with the Ouija board so I just thought…”

I laughed again and said, “That’s quite all right. Happens all the time. Think nothing of it. Anyway, as long as you are here is there anything I can do for you.”

“Well, sir, it’s a little hard to ask this but my kid would really like your autograph. It would make every other kid at the devil academy really jealous.”

“What’s his name?”


So I took out a piece of paper and wrote, “To my dear friend and future servant, Adamalius, Uncle Chuckie Cosimano.” and handed it to the demon who thanked me profusely and then disappeared.

No rest for the wicked, no rest at all.

Martian in the Iron Mask Day


Once again we celebrate the Martian in the Iron Mask. We are inspired in life by many things and this comic book villain inspired me to take up mind control.

It was a simple thing, an eight page story in a comic book. But it had a farther reach than the authors could have imagined.

Xotar Day!!!


Hooray hooray! It’s Xotar Day!

It’s Xotar Day all day today.

Jury Nullification


One of the most sacred rights of all Americans is the right to a trial by jury. There is a drawback to it in that jurors tend to not be the brightest people in the world being made up of people who are too stupid to avoid jury duty, but it is a right and with the right help anyone can get away with anything no matter what the evidence. When I was in a jury pool when I was a young man, we were given an orientation and the judge doing it, the great Louis Garippo, told us that if you have any reason to vote to acquit, vote to acquit. A jury can do no wrong when it says “not guilty.”

Ok, let us fast forward about ten years. There was an article in the Chicago Tribune. It seemed that whenever WGN played the movie Twelve Angry Men, a classic and great movie about how one juror persuades the rest of his fellows of the innocence of the accused, the next day any case that went to a jury ended in acquittal. It was driving the Cook County State’s Attorney’s office crazy and they were moving heaven and earth to avoid having cases go to juries the day after that movie played.

You can see where this is leading. Of course I began experimenting with playing the movie and beaming it at the courthouse. And you can guess the results. Yeah, technically highly illegal, but hell, how would anyone know and even if they did, how could they possibly hope to get a conviction.

How is this done. You will need a helmet, a radionic box and a photo of the courthouse.

You set the box and helmet up to broadcast at the courthouse. Then you watch a video of the movie. It is as simple as that. It does not matter how from the trial you are, the jury will acquit.

Have fun.

I’m Sorry


But I have no reason to give a damn about which large group of foreigners killed another large group of foreigners before I was born.



Psionics laughs at Censorship


It really does. Think about it. If I make a post on facebook it may reach if incredibly lucky a few thousand people, most of whom will not even pay any attention to it.

But considered, if I distill that post into a few words, like hashtag sort of thing, put that on my screen, wear a helmet plugged into a radionic box it can reach a hundred million people in their sleep. And the beauty of it is there is not a god damned thing anyone can do about it.

You can’t moderate Psionics.



A new year has come and it promises to be even more fun than the one before it.

Chaos will reign and those wise enough will enjoy the never ending entertainment.



In this corner is a multi billion dollar corporation.

In this corner is an angry man in a helmet.

Place your bets. The game is about to begin.

A Catholic Saint


Is nothing more than a pedophile with a press agent.