Archive for February, 2015

Martian in the Iron Mask Day


martian mask

Once again it is time to celebrate the Martian in the Iron Mask. And I think this time I’m going to give a little explanation of why he matters.

First the date of the celebration is inaccurate. Memory does strange things and I was certain that I had gotten the comic book on this date. Well, I was wrong. The book came out in April of 1958 and I got it from my mother while I was recovering from a bought of measles combined with pnuemonia that damned near killed me dead. So my memory would have been a bit off from the beginning.

The character does mark something. I know that I knew about mental powers by the time I was eight. I even wrote something about something being controlled by mind power that year. What happened here was that the character resonated with something in me. If you look at the face in that medieval helmet, it looks cool. And the idea of a negative super-hero appealed to me.

The Martian was just plain fun. And the way he robbed banks and drove the constabulary to distraction was wonderful. Try to imagine a dumb pig firing his gun and instead of bullets, flowers come out the muzzle. You couldn’t get that by putting acid in their donuts!

It was a delightful exposure to the fact that badness is just more fun than goodness and being the bad guy was just plain enjoyable.

And so we celebrate this comic book, because after encountering it I resolved to play the villain. And knew that mind control was the way to go about it.


Xotar Day Hooray Hooray



It’s the Feast of Xotar, when the good Cosimanian Orthodox all over the world celebrate the comic book character that made Uncle Chuckie finally decide that it really was more fun to be the bad guy.

When the Space Shuttle Went Kaboom


The local news media made a really boring big deal because one of the astronauts was from Racine. So I had a little fun. Sung to the tune of The Yellow Rose of Texas.

Chorus: Oh her head’s in Amarillo,
Her feets in Arkansas
The rest of her body looked like it met with a chainsaw,
‘Cause the Jewboy flushed the toilet,
And blewed them all to bits,
They really messed with Texas
And gave them Texans the shits.

She was the ugliest thing
That Nasa ever seen
It was only appropriate that she’d came from Racine
But the Jewboy flushed the toilet
And blewed them all to bits,
They really messed with Texas
And gave them Texans the shits.


Oh Texas fined NASA,
For littering it’s true
Because all over Texas them shuttle pieces flew
Cause the Jewboy flushed that toilet
And blewed them all to bits
They really messed with Texas
And gave them Texans the shits.